Syd's Home Page

Syd Allan: Limericks I Wrote For My Kids


Yahoo has a list of limericks at http://www.yahoo.ca/Arts/Humanities/Literature/Poetry/Humorous/Limericks/


the oldest Link child's name is Todd
and his habits are really quite odd
he threatened his sister
he shot her (he missed her)
she's lucky his aiming was flawed

my daughter's canine's name is Max
he can order his dinner by fax!!
he pays the food fee at the CIBC
and he always remembers the tax

Janice's son's name is Miles
he is ever so cute when he smiles
in the bathtub he'll play
about 9 times a day
and get water all over the tiles

io, titania, titan,
miranda, callisto, hyperion
pan, amalthea, demeter, rhea,
ganymede, oberon, triton.

when a girl is so clever at eight
the people around her think "Great!"
"she has all the knowledge to go straight to college!"
they expect it. they don't want to wait.

magnesium, helium, lithium,
potassium, calcium, sodium,
neon, argon, xenon, krypton,
beryllium, barium, cesium.

when you live in a really small town
there aren't many people around
but the ones who are there
are all eager to share
and things that are lost are soon found

i go to a school called "J.L."
there are many strange tales i could tell
but the strangest of all
took place out in the hall
when we noticed a really bad smell
we started to blame one another
till i noticed my own little brother
had discovered the source
(it was not him of course!)
it was then that we started to smother
the stench just grew thicker and thicker
and the children got sicker and sicker
we were choking and dazed
and becoming half crazed
and the teachers were starting to bicker
kids from the high-school down the road
had made all of our toilets explode!
they had used dynamite
they had stolen at night
they were playing a trick but it showed...
that a high-schooler's smarts may be vast
from the hundreds of tests they have passed
but they now know to use
a three foot longer fuse
to avoid getting caught in the blast.